Smile

She always wore a smile 

No matter how hard they’d try

She’d never break no matter how much they pry 

She just laugh with them

And wouldn’t give them any mind

But when she’s alone away from all their eyes

Shit sit down alone

And she would breakdown and cry 

She would cry and cry

Even if her eyes were starting to dry

Crying until the pain would subside

So she could start the day with a smile

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A friend

We accept people for who they are

And we trust them

So much that we’d drop everything for them

We open up to them

And so they give us their trust

They rely on us

But they rely too much

That they start to take advantage of us

They start to think that only we can be there for them

And no one else

But when we can’t be who they want us to be

They hurt

They cry

They flee

And we’re left empty

Regretting that we couldn’t be

Who they needed to be

Secrets

Words of oppression

Words of abuse

Words of rape

Words of worry and concern 

Words of depression 

Words of pain

Words of sorrow

Words of suicide 

Toxicity and ruined lives

There’s so many things I want people to know

So many things I want people to feel 

But instead I have to keep them concealed

Their stories they want no one to hear

They hide pain, fear and tears 

Because they don’t want anyone worry

They don’t like the states of others judging

So I keep their secrets inside of me

But people should know about the people that are hurting

So I scream and shout 

So that everyone can hear me

So they can hear my voice

And the voice of those who couldn’t speak for themselves

Lingering Feelings

Hearing the music you’d always play

Drinking the coffee you’d always buy

I’m constantly surrouned by things that remind me of you

Sometimes I wonder

If there will ever be a day

When I can finally say

I’m truly over you

Living

I don’t know what I’m doing

Overwhelmed by my thoughts and feelings

Is it okay to continue how I’ve been living?

Lost, with no idea of where I’m heading

I want to be free from fear and anxiety

But where do I start?

How do I find my new beginning?

Or am I meant to live a life of suffering?

Or is this life’s true meaning?

To struggle

The struggle to keep feeling

The struggle to keep dreaming

The struggle to keep living.

Role of a Bystander

I watch you shatter

I watch you scatter across the floor

I watch you pick up the pieces

trying to make yourself whole

I see you struggling with burning emotions

Yet your expression is stone cold

I want reach out to you

But I know it’s something I can’t do

So I’ll do my best at what I can do

So that one day you can be you

The you that you want to

What If? 

I want to get mad at you 

But I know

That everything you said was true 

No matter what I do

I just can’t get mad at you

You hurt me

And I hurt you too

Can you tell me

What am I supposed to do? 

I just want you and me

To go back to how we used to be

I wish I had told you that

When there used to be a you and me

Then maybe there wouldn’t be a you 

And someone I  wish that was me